If someone comes up with the question: “Do you value yourself?”
Are you ready with an answer? Statistics show that a good share of women in our society do not value themselves, despite all their talents, beauty, education and achievements. Why are we so prone to looking down on ourselves? For one reason mainly – we are queens of comparisons. We live our lives as a function of comparing who we are, what we have, what are our dreams and plans are compared to those of other women whom we think have it all!
Funnily enough, these very same women live their lives comparing themselves to others and the snowballing process goes on. Added to this fact is that in our comparisons, we never favour or see our true virtues and talents, but always imagine someone else to be far better than us.
We try to find validation in achievements to compensate for what we think we don’t have. There are those who apply themselves to careers that cost them their relationships. Others fall pregnant thinking that motherhood will bring them a sense of self importance. Young ladies who come from a modest background believe that excelling in academic studies will make others see how intelligent they are. Not a few throw themselves into marriage to earn the respect of their families. How can anyone look for value in external factors, if true value comes from the inside? If you don’t see yourself for who you are, acknowledging your talents, your virtues, your strong points as much as you are able to point out your flaws and shortcomings, no one in the world will do that for you.
We make people see us in the way we see ourselves. So if you look down on yourself, how can you expect your boyfriend to look up to you? If you act out of insecurity with your boss, how can you think he would trust you on big projects?
These are difficult questions to confront. When will you recognize you have changed? It is only when you acknowledge that you don’t need to be like everyone else, that you don’t need to compromise your choices to belong to a group, that you don’t need to follow the crowd or just be part of them.
It is most important to realise that when you valued yourself the least, God chose you. So who are you to doubt His choice?
“But now, thus says the Lord who created you, O Jacob, and He who formed you, O Israel: Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by your name; you are Mine.” (Isa 43:1 –MEV)